For Ladies – Things You Should Never Say To Your Man!!!

To keep your relationship healthy and happy, it is advisable to stay away from the following words. + “Man up.” This phrase is never, ever appropriate. He is a man. If he’s not meeting your expectations, learn to communicate this clearly and without insult. + “We need to talk.” Yes, you should talk to your man. No, you should not warn him that you need to talk about something yet-to-be-described that will likely be uncomfortable. This phrase is the most likely to shift him into defensive mode. Try a more loving approach and you will surely get better results. + “Is she prettier than me?” Or “Do I look fat in this dress?” If the question you are asking him has only one acceptable answer – and if a too-long pause in responding will only feed your insecurities – just trust that his answer would have been the right one and don’t bother to ask it. + “You’re just like my ex.” Or “I have had someone better.” You don’t want to be compared to his exes, so don’t compare him to yours. Even if he comes out on top, it’s still an awkward comparison. + “Are you really that silly?” Be careful not to use language that belittles your guy. Treat him with respect, even when you are angry or disappointed. + “Never mind. I will do it myself.” Don’t dismiss the offers of help from your man. A common love language is an act of service. Don’t deny him the opportunity to serve you. Sometimes it’s nice to feel needed. + “I can’t live without you.” Use desperate language with caution, and stay clear of phrases that sound clingy in early stages of the relationship. Let him take the lead when it comes to commitment and promises of a future together. + “I am not your mother.” Or “I am just like my mother.” Keep your moms out of it, unless you are actually talking about patterns learned from your respective families of origin. + “Nothing is wrong.” Yes, it is. He can’t read your mind. If something is wrong, tell him what’s wrong.

Signs You Are In A Healthy Relationship!!!

Most couples tend to define their relationship as being good or bad. However, psychiatrists and marriage counselors believe that the actual term that should define a relationship is “healthy”. A relationship (be it a healthy or an unhealthy one), has to pass through testing times. If you too are going through some ups and downs, it is best to find out how healthy your relationship is. Here are a few things which will help you to discover the current state of your relationship. + Mutual respect This is an ultimate test for any relationship. Respecting your partner is perhaps the biggest contribution you can make towards a stronger relationship. This does not mean that you start worshipping your partner. Here, respect could be something as simple as admiring them for the manner in which they handle a stressful situation and fulfill their duties towards you. + Personal crisis is not an individual struggle Everybody goes through difficult times due to factors such as health, workplace and family issues. However, in a healthy relationship, your problems are no longer just yours. This means, he or she is there to sense that you are struggling with something, and is also ready to help. Couple-hood loses its essence if the two of you are not there for each other during tough times. + No Room for abuse This refers to an abusive behavior beyond the realm of just saying negative words to each other. Forcing you to relent even when you are not in the mood to get intimate is also a type of physical and mental abuse. Also, being repeatedly badmouthed by the in-laws despite your best attempts to appease them is parallel to being psychologically abused. If such things are part of your relationship, it is certainly not healthy. + Being happy for each other comes naturally If you two can feel happy for each other for the smallest of accomplishments, it indicates a healthy relationship. For instance, if your wife is praised by her boss, it is a reason enough for you to feel happy for her. Similarly, the smallest layer of muscle your husband has added through his gyming makes you kiss him with adoration. These are strong indications that your bond does not need significant happenings to make you feel happy for the other person. + Minimal boredom This is perhaps the most common relationship challenge till date. Most couples, who have a difficult time dealing with their couple-hood (including the newlyweds), keep talking about a certain kind of boredom that has set in their relationship. Though this is an inevitable part of any relationship, the boredom should not become overwhelming. So much so, that you no longer wait for the ‘exclusive moments’ with him or her. If it has been more than a couple of months when you last spent some quality time with your spouse, your relationship is for sure taking a gradual nosedive. + Honesty is not an issue When being honest, and I mean, being brutally honest with each other is not an issue, you can be assured that you share a healthy relationship. This is easier said than done, since sharing what you actually feel, your opinions or emotional state in its absolute sincere form does not come easy.

Signs He Isn’t Over His Ex!

Do you ever get the feeling that there are three people in your relationship – you, your guy and his ex? Does he still talk or email with her often? Or maybe he holds an unhealthy grudge, or seems preoccupied with what she’s doing now? If any of these scenarios sound familiar, it may mean that he hasn’t completely let go yet. How can you tell if he’s not really over his ex? + He wasted no time before jumping into his next relationship. If you started dating this guy shortly after his latest breakup, there’s a good chance he’s not completely over his ex – no matter what he says. “There are hopes and dreams we have when we get into a relationship that we lose when we lose that relationship,” says Tessina. “It takes some time [to get over those things].” She points out that men often avoid the grieving process that follows a breakup, even though it can be instrumental in helping them assess the relationship and move on. “You want to be sure he can talk about it – that he can analyze it a little bit, and can say what went wrong and what went right and what part he played in what went wrong.” But even if he isn’t quite there, it doesn’t mean your relationship is doomed. As Tessina explains, “It just means you need to understand that he still has some processing to do, and he’s probably going to do some of it with you.” + He fell for you before his relationship ended. These are men like John Edwards and Tiger Woods, who tell you their previous relationships are over or broken, but they still go home to their wives or girlfriends. It sounds obvious, but these guys are bad news. “It doesn’t matter if he says the relationship is bad,” Tessina says. “He has a cheating mentality.” And if he cheats on her, he probably wouldn’t have a problem with cheating on you. Even if he does eventually leave his wife or girlfriend – a very big if, by the way — and you’re willing to give it a go with this guy, he literally hasn’t had any time on his own to process the demise of that previous relationship so you could run into the same problems as in #1, above. Bottom line: This is probably not someone you want to be with. + When it comes to his ex, he only deals in extremes. If your new guy can’t say his ex’s name without spitting, this is another warning sign. “If he’s talking about her constantly, and she’s either the most wonderful thing in the world or the most terrible thing in the world, but it’s unrealistic, you need to ask him about his role in the relationship,” says Tessina. There are two people in every couple, and there’s no way his ex was as great or awful as he makes her sound. “If he’s not talking about it at all, you need to say ‘I think it’s valuable to for us to talk about our past relationships so we can see what went wrong and what we need to do differently in this relationship.’” + He can’t break the string. There are plenty of reasons a guy may stay in touch with his ex, and they aren’t necessarily all bad. “If they have kids in common, they have to be in contact,” Tessina says. “If they were together for a long, long time, there’s also some reason for contact.” But if neither situation applies, and he still won’t stop talking to his ex, you should initiate a conversation about her – carefully. “What you don’t want to do is set yourself up against his ex,” says Tessina. Here, too, she recommends talking to him about his relationship with his ex, and what he thinks he can do better or differently in your relationship. She also suggests offering to reach out to the ex yourself, but if he’s not up for that – and if he doesn’t seem compelled to change anything about the current situation, even if it’s making you uncomfortable – that’s a major red flag. “I would slow the relationship down immediately [in those circumstances],” she says. “I’d say, ‘I can’t go further if you’re going to have a relationship with somebody that has to be behind my back.’” + He obsesses over the remnants of the relationship. If he’s always checking her Facebook profile or you catch him poring over old pictures, you could also have a problem. “He’s not finished, he hasn’t done his grieving,” says Tessina. “You have to understand that if you stay in a relationship with him, you’re going to be part of that grieving process.” As Tessina points out, when you’re in a relationship you talk about just about everything. Whether it’s work, friends or family, there’s always something to discuss over dinner, and past relationships should be no different. Let him know you’re open to talking about his exes. Discussing this relationship could help him work through his feelings and move forward – and may even bring the two of you closer together. If your guy hasn’t completely let go of his ex, proceed with caution – but know that your relationship isn’t necessarily a lost cause. He may want to be with you, but needs just a bit more time to deal with his breakup. The key to making it work is both of you being willing to talk openly about his old relationship and his feelings about his ex. And if, when all is said and done, he just can’t let go, you may have to be the one who moves on.

Reasons He’s Not Calling You His Girlfriend

It’s Not You, It’s Him For a man, sometimes commitment can be a taboo subject. I myself went through a long period of ducking, dodging and running from it. As I matured, my perception changed, and instead of avoiding it, I actually began to desire it. The truth is being in a relationship isn’t a top priority for many men these days. (Especially when we can get s*x without having to be in one.) As a result, many of you reading this find yourselves in “situations” instead of relationships. You deserve to know why. It’s not you, it’s him. My goal is to help you date responsibly by equipping you with the information that you need to make great choices in the men you date and ultimately attach yourself to. Here are some possible reasons he hasn’t called you his girlfriend. + He Already Has One When you say that out loud it makes you chuckle a bit, right? But, the reality is, it could be true. He may not be committing to you because he is already committed. If you find yourself constantly not being able to get a hold of him, you spend little to no time at his home and all you seem to get is spur of the moment phone calls and visits, then somebody may have gotten there before you. Be careful. + He’s Just Not that Into You It’s a little cliché, I know, but accurate nonetheless. He just might not like you enough to make you his girlfriend. (It happens a lot.) This doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you; he just doesn’t like you enough to submit to you being the only one in his life. He’ll do enough to keep you around and make you happy but not enough to leave you satisfied. There is no mystery here. Here’s a hard truth: If he wanted to be with you, he would be. + You Gave Him Benefits, Now He Just Wants to Be Friends When I was single, I went through a period where I simply wanted to have s*x with the women I was dating. Some of them I was honest with and some of them I wasn’t. It left many of them frustrated. This leads me to my point: I am in no position to tell you what to do with your body. However, at some point, if a healthy relationship is what you seek, you must determine what he must give you in exchange for what you give him. Whether it be time or commitment, choose wisely. + He’s Too Chicken Sometimes commitment downright scares men. It’s sad, but true. Perhaps a past relationship left a scar and he’s afraid to connect with anyone on that level again. If this is the case, be patient with him but don’t compromise your standards. + You Made It All Too Easy for Him If you were guaranteed to make 75K a year, drive a BMW and live in an amazing condo in the middle of the city just because you graduated high school, would you feel the need to go to college? Exactly. See where I’m going with this? Many of you make his bed, make his plate and even clean his bathroom without any hint of exclusivity in your “situation.” If you become his girlfriend before you actually are his girlfriend, he has no real incentive to make you his girlfriend. Think about it and date responsibly instead of playing wife. + Your Greatness Isn’t On His Level Even the worst of us can recognize a good woman when we meet her. That can be intimidating for some brothers. There are times where the special qualities in you frightens us, so, like cowards, we run. There is absolutely nothing you can do about this but walk away — which you should. Be who you are and let the chips fall where they may. + He Thinks He’s A Player It’s summer, summer summertime. When the sun comes out and the clothes come off — well, he gets distracted. You better not wait around until the winter if commitment is what you desire. If he is only interested in commitment during a certain time of year, then he’s not worthy of you any day, week, month or season. It’s convenience that he desires, so don’t give it to him or wait up for it. + He Thinks He’s A Player It’s summer, summer summertime. When the sun comes out and the clothes come off — well, he gets distracted. You better not wait around until the winter if commitment is what you desire. If he is only interested in commitment during a certain time of year, then he’s not worthy of you any day, week, month or season. It’s convenience that he desires, so don’t give it to him or wait up for it.

Relationships: Some Signs That Your Girlfriend Will Make A Good Wife

Marriage is one of the most important journeys that a person can embark on. It is life-changing and can be destructive if it is embarked on with the wrong person. You have to be absolutely sure that the woman in your life is someone you’ll be happy spending time with every day of your life, forever. Here are some signs that the woman in your life will make a good wife. + She’s Nurturing A woman who will make a good wife has to be caring and nurturing. She’s going to be majorly responsible for the well-being of you and your children. She should be kind and compassionate, willing to take care of others without grumbling. + She’s Dependable A great wife should be someone you can trust and rely on. She should be someone who will support her man no matter what, someone you know you can count on, come rain, come shine. + She’s Respectful Disrespect is one of the major causes of marital dysfunction. The woman you decide to marry should respect you no matter what. She should respect your family and your friends, even if she doesn’t like them. She should be a respectful person all round. + She’s Humble A proud woman will encourage grudges and nothing destroys relationships faster than malice. The ideal wife should be able to apologize even when she isn’t in the wrong. + She’s emotionally stable The woman you decide to marry should be stable emotionally and otherwise. An emotionally unstable woman can’t handle the pressures of marriage. She should be mature and know how to handle situations without constantly losing her cool. You don’t want to marry a woman who will break down in tears over every little challenge. + She loves children The ideal wife should love children. She should like to have them around her and willing to play with them always. This is a sign that she’ll be capable of taking care of the family you build together. + You have a lot in common It can be the same kind of music or the same hobbies or even just a love of books. If there are things you both like to do, that’s a good sign you are entering a marriage of happiness and longevity. + You have great communication There is nothing more important in a relationship than communication, and if you are considering making it official by marrying her, you have to feel comfortable talking with her about any and everything. The more you communicate with your woman, the less likely the two of you will get into arguments because you both will be able to talk about your problems instead of holding them in. + You can laugh together Mutual laughter is an essential component of a strong and healthy marriage. Romance is much better if you can see humour in the little things and can have a laugh together. + She will cook I believe even if a woman doesn't know how to cook, she can be taught how to cook so far she is willing to learn. She might not know how to cook probably because they had cooks and maids in her family so she didn't have the opportunity to learn or that she attended boarding schools all her life so know for sure that she is willing to learn and know. She doesn’t have to be a chef but a great wife must be able to feed her family. Above all, you must remember that there’s no such thing as a perfect person so there can’t be a perfect wife. Love is about accepting that person you’ve chosen even with all their flaws and deciding to love them no matter what. So what do you think guys? What other qualities do you consider necessary for an ideal wife? Share your opinions in the comment box. Thank you.

Things you must know about your woman

So you love her, and you’re starting to see a future. How do you make absolutely sure she would make the right partner? Here are some questions you should ask her before you pop the question. Money Ask her: What would you do if you won N50,000,000 in the lottery? You must find out her financial priorities. One of the biggest problems couples have is money and, specifically, differences in styles of spending and attitudes about their budget. You’ll learn how she views money, saving, and long-term investing. Will all of it go toward cars and trips, or most toward retirement? It’s not essential that you share the same investment strategies. What’s important is to use the conversation to prompt a discussion about financial behavior: how you pay bills, invest the year-end bonus, or decide on major purchases. If your attitudes don’t mesh, now’s the time to get the issues on the table and build a consensus. Her Family Ask her: What’s your favorite holiday? How does your family spend it? It’s important to learn about her family roots. Where you spend the holidays can be a huge political issue. The underlying issue is whose family comes first, and that stands for who has the power in the relationship. Her Work Ask her: What’s your dream job? Where would you most like to live? You need to know her goals, and how far she’s willing to go to reach them. Just asking shows support for her career, an important factor. Those who felt they had more support had greater satisfaction than those who felt unsupported. It’s also a good time to find out how far she’s willing to move away from her family. It’s a very under-appreciated area of stress—where are you going to live, whose family are you going to live near—yours or hers?. Your Work Ask her: What was your dad’s work schedule like? You need to find out whether she’s already lived with a man who had the same work ethic and schedule as yours. Maybe her dad worked a 7-to-3 shift every day of his life, came home and played with the kids until they went to bed, and never worked weekends. Maybe he owned a business and set his own hours so he was always home for dinner. But your job—or your future job—may require late meetings, 60-hour workweeks, and business trips. And that can put stress on a relationship. “Working until 9, 10, sometimes later, night after night, is a constant source of stress with my wife,” a man said. “She still doesn’t understand that this is the nature of the business at deadline time. It’s not the life she was used to.” Ask her: How do you see yourself in the future? This will help you find out whether she wants to be a career girl or a stay-at-home mom or a mom with a career. You should know whether she expects to live in a big house or an apartment in the city. More and more research shows that the “opposites attract” notion is a myth. Successful couples usually have more similar priorities than not. A couple has to have similar goals and a long-term plan, worked out together, to reach these goals. And, even more important, a similar tolerance for risk and sacrifice. If you don’t share the same values, they’ll be a constant source of conflict in terms of how you spend your time and money. Discipline Style Ask her: What do you think of spanking as punishment? You need to hear her thoughts on disciplining kids. We assume you’ve worked out whether you both want children, and maybe even how many. (You have done this, right?) But how you’ll discipline them is a topic that’s often overlooked. Bring it up the next time you see an stubborn, unruly child at a restaurant. Ask her how she’d handle it and how she was disciplined as a child. Either we tend to follow the way we were raised, or, if something was objectionable about the way we were raised, we do the opposite. Different parenting styles can cause the most strain on a marriage because they can be a daily, even hourly, source of conflict. Genetics Ask her: What do your parents like to drink? It’s important to know if there’s a history of alcoholism in her family. Health problems like depression and alcoholism have a strong genetic component. If her mother had depression or her father was a chronic alcoholic, there’s a good chance it could creep up and become a problem.” It’s not a relationship killer, but talking about hereditary health risks early will make it easier to discuss the same conflicts should they pop up in your relationship. Your Potential In-Laws Ask her: How have your parents reacted to your previous boyfriends? You should find out whether they’ll think the current boyfriend is good enough for their little princess (and whether they’ll pay big bucks for the wedding). If her parents don’t approve, there’s a potential problem,. Not that that’s necessarily a deal breaker. Who are you marrying, her or them? What’s more important is to learn something about your girlfriend by how she responds. Is she the kind of girl who wants to please Mommy and Daddy? Or is she secure enough with herself to make her own life decisions? Her Father Ask her: What was your relationship with your father like? This helps you find out her attitude toward men. Especially toward the one who mattered most (before you). If her father was distant and cold, she may seek male approval. If her father was abusive or a cheat, she may have trouble trusting men. If there’s any unfinished business in her relationship with her father, it could manifest itself in your relationship. When people get into serious relationships, they tend to look to their mate to give them everything they need. Couples get into trouble when they don’t look closely at these tendencies early on. You also should consider her relationship with her mother, which could have the very same implications. If she can’t pee without calling her mother to tell her all the details, that’s not going to change after you walk down the aisle. God Ask her: Who is God to you? This helps you know how high she places God. A woman who does not truly know, honor and has the fear of God cannot truly love her husband. God is love so a woman who does not truly know God does not know love. The moment she says 'I do', she makes you her earthly god so knowing who God is to her gives you an insight on who you'll be to her. And the Ultimate Question . . . Finally, you need to ask yourself this: “Can I ask these questions and have an honest, intelligent conversation with this woman when we disagree?” Because if you can’t, none of her answers really matter.

7 Conversations You Must Have Before Marriage

As a relationship specialist, one of my biggest concerns has to do with all the emphasis that’s placed on the wedding day. Here are some topics to discuss with your spouse-to-be before the big day: 1. Will you have kids and, if so, how will you raise them? Assuming that you both want to be parents someday, how many do you want to have and how will you raise them as co-parents? Will they be raised under one religion? How do you expect to discipline them? What are your expectations about taking them on vacations? What are the expectations about who will be the primary caretaker? If one of you goes on parental leave, will that person be expected to eventually go back to work? 2. How will you manage your finances? What individual assets and debts will you bring to the marriage? Who will pay the bills? What will be considered a “big ticket” item and how much money can spend on a purchase before you should consult your spouse? How will you save? What are your financial goals and how will you reach them together? Will there be joint bank account or separate bank accounts? Will you each have an allowance of spending money and how much? 3. How will you spend free time? How do you expect to spend it — together or individually? Will you still have time with friends that doesn’t include each other? How often would you like to vacation and what kind of destinations would you like to visit? How will you let each other know if you feel like you need space? 4. Do you have expectations about s*x? How often will you have s*x? When is a good time? How will you keep your s*x life from getting boring? How will you share s*xual fantasies and desires? Do you have any boundaries when it comes to intimacy? 5. How will you divvy up chores?Who will do what in the home? If your spouse cooks dinner, are you expected to clean the dishes, pots and pans? Who will keep up with the maintenance around the house? Who will mow the lawn or take out the trash? Will the children lend a hand in the chores and will they be given an allowance? How will you divvy up the everyday load? 6. What can you do to openly communicate? How can you make sure that you keep your communication as good as it is now? How will you make sure to handle your conflicts appropriately? Will you check in with each other at the end of the day or once a week? What can you do as an individual to make sure that you keep the health of your marriage a priority? 7. Do you have any annoyances? What annoys you? What annoys your spouse-to-be? How will you let each other know when certain habits or behaviors bother you? How is it best to tell the other person about things regarding family that are upsetting? Paraphrasing a famous commercial from years ago: the more educated you are, the better off you will be. So, have yourselves an intelligent and informative conversation so that when the big day arrives, you’ll have a ball!

5 Things Super Happy Couples Do Every Day

I’m sure most would agree that marriage takes a bit of work. But, what “thing” worth having doesn’t? We all have our good days and just okay days. Sometimes it takes a while to get out the valley of “bad” days as a married couple. Do you know a couple that seems to be really happy? Have you ever asked a couple that you admire, just how they do it? Here are 5 things super happy couples do everyday. 1. Make time to connect. This includes talking to each other without holding or sitting in front of anything with a screen (i.e. laptop, cell phone, TV, iPad). 2. Remind each other that you’re sexy. 3. Share a guilty pleasure. As couples, you should have a favorite show or other secret fun you can indulge in. 4. Enrich yourselves as individuals. You should learn to enjoy yourselves individually by doing what each one of you enjoys doing. 5. Get spiritual together.

Fighting Another Woman: “Just Another Stupid Game”

Sometimes I marvel at the way ladies fight over their man even when the man involved doesn’t seem interested. Why waste your time on a fight that’s not yours? Men are the ones that go out looking for a better mistress. You don’t expect the other lady to know that you exist. Even if she manages to find out. It is only a decent and God fearing lady that will quit the relationship with your man. Most will just continue even the mind of daring you at a later time. They don’t care what happens, they are ever ready. You are in charge of your relationship but not in charge of the man’s mind. Even if you challenge him about it. He could lie about it or admit and beg for forgiveness. Even after pleading,he could either stop the game or continue at your back with an holy face. What are you supposed to do then? Men are beings that have the normal tendency to cheat. They are mostly not contented,only few stick to the 1-1 principle. So no point killing yourself or the other lady. Its either you communicate your feelings about it with full humility and keep praying for him. Either way, some men will continue. You need to understand that its only God that can change his heart and not you. Especially for the married, you can only forgive him and keep praying for a change. Your fighting or nagging will only contribute to it. The bottom line here is that, don’t fight other ladies because of your man. Its not worth it. Let the man prove his worth and show you some respect.

He's a good guy

The ladies will love this one. There is no clear way to distinctively tell if a guy is a good one or a bad one during the first few months of the relationship since the first few months are always the good times when the love’s fire is still burning wildly….. Below are some signs which might help in knowing if the guy is gonna turn out good.   1. He ask “Hows Your Day?” Some men ask how’s your day while secretly hoping you won’t tell them because they really could care less about your day… Then there’s the good guy who ask “How’s your day” and you can feel that he really cares :) 2. He treats his mother good: some women think if a man is real close to his mother it’s a red flag that he’s a big “Momma’s boy”, NONE of us ladies want that, however, i believe its a great sign when a man is close to and respects his mom, it usually means that he respects women in general and will show you the same respect 3. He’s honest & trustworthy: I think everyone is guilty of telling little-white-lies… but occasionally we’ll meet some one who is far beyond a little-white-liar, smh. I knew a man who i honestly think could get an award for “Biggest Liar” on the planet!! this man would constantly lie about the dumbest things that didn’t even make sense to lie about. If you’re gonna lie, At least lie for a reason (sheeesh) lol… There’s something to be said about a honest man, it’s attractive, sometimes the truth hurts but at least you know his word is golden. A trustworthy man is a beautiful thing, If he’s trustworthy it means he makes you feel safe enough to open up and tell him things you wouldn’t dare tell another soul. That’s a rare and special kind of man. 4. He keeps his word with you: A really good sign of a good man is he keeps his word with you. If he says he going to do something, he does it because disappointing you is the last thing he wants to do. 5. He spends quality time with you: Quality time is VERY important for a healthy relationship. If a man loves being with you and spending quality time, that’s a great sign. 6. He shows you how he feels: Ever heard the saying “Actions speak louder than words”? that’s one of the truest sayings in the world. Any one can say “i love you” or “i care about you” but the question is…. do they show it? 7. He listens to you: Listening is one of the most underrated qualities. it’s annoying when a man over talks or constantly cuts off his partner or just seems uninterested in what his partner has to say. When a man listens to you and hears what you are saying, it shows what you have to say matters to him. 8. He respects you: When a man respects you, it shows in every way, the way he speaks to you, the way he speaks about you to others, little things he does like opening the door…etc. 9. When you have a bad day he tries to make it better: When you are having one of those not-so-good days, he tries to put a smile on your face or make you laugh because seeing you sad hurts him. 10. He accepts you for who YOU are: Sometime men will get with a woman and then start requesting changes. “stop wearing so much makeup” or “why are you wearing that outfit”.. a good guy loves and accepts you just the way you are. If you want to change yourself, the you know he is not forcing you to change. That you are only adjusting to be a better person.

Why sex should be after marriage

True love waits. If a boy or girl truly loves you, they will want the best for you. They will not want you to suffer fear of disease, unwanted pregnancy and the psychological difficulties of premarital s*x. They will want to experience love with you only in the very best place of all – the love nest of marriage. 1. S*x is a powerful force that can destroy if not used properly. Like atomic power, s*x is the most powerful creative force given to man. When atomic power is used correctly it can create boundless energy; when it is used in the wrong way it destroys life. S*x is the same kind of powerful force. S*x is a gift from God to give us the greatest pleasure, to help in creating a deep companionship with one’s spouse and for procreation of the next generation. But if you play with this powerful force outside the bounds of marriage, it destroys you and those close to you. 2. Intimate activity for young people arrests their psychological, social and academic development. Studies show that when young people engage in premarital s*x, their academic performance declines and their social relationships with family and friends deteriorate. This is because adolescents are too immature to deal with the explosive s*x drive and it tends to dominate their life. 3. Majority of women cannot enjoy s*x outside of the bonds of marriage. The development of a fulfilling s*x life needs the security and peace of the marriage bond. Premarital s*x usually takes place sneaking around in hidden places dealing with the fear of being caught, the fear of pregnancy and feelings of guilt. All these (worrisome) factors undermine pleasure in premarital s*x, most especially for women. 4. Virginity is to be given to the most important person in your life, the person you committed yourself to stay with forever in marriage. Your virginity is the most precious thing you have to give to your spouse. Once you lose it, nothing in the world can bring it back. Don’t lose something so precious in a thoughtless way. 5. Those who engage in premarital s*x run a high risk of contracting one of the many venereal diseases rampant today, as well as losing their fertility. Not just AIDS, but other common disfiguring diseases like herpes have no cure. 6. Some venereal diseases have no symptoms and many couples discover many years later that they became infertile because of these diseases. Infertility experts estimate that 80% of today’s infertility is due to venereal diseases contracted before they married. 7. The best and only method that guarantees 100% against AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases is to wait for marriage to have s*x and maintain fidelity in your marriage. 8. Premarital s*x breaks the 10 Commandments given by God. The 10 Commandments are given to man by God to make man happy. They are not outdated and they are not restrictive. If we follow these laws, we can create happy and prosperous lives. If we don’t follow them, we will pay a heavy price in divorce, disease, abortions, illegitimate children and loneliness. Modern men make a big mistake when they think that they can break these eternal laws and not suffer consequences. 9. Premarital s*x runs the risk of conceiving illegitimate children. Numerous scientific studies show that the children of single mothers suffer psychologically and are less successful socially and academically than children from intact families. Above all, children need both their father and their mother. It is wrong to risk having children who will never have their father’s love, protection and care. 10. If you date and you don’t have s*x, you can forget about that relationship when you stop dating. But if you have s*x with those you date and then break up, the nature of intimate involvement creates strong, often unpleasant memories for your whole life. Every relationship you break up where you had intimate relations is like a mini-divorce. The psychological difficulties of these mini-divorces does damage to your character. Later, when you are married and go to bed with your beloved spouse, these unpleasant memories will accompany you.

7 reasons ladies fall for the wrong man

Here are a few reasons why women fall for the wrong man: 1. Ladies, you know how people always say, “Actions speak louder than words?” Well, this very saying is getting a lot of you in big trouble. Yes, actions do speak, but please understand actions also lie and in some cases lie more than words. Actions only speak louder when the heart and motives of the person pursing you is pure. If that is not the case, then what you have is manipulation and womanizing. Many men already know they can fool you with actions and words, so stop believing actions mean anything unless it’s done consistently over a long period of time. Don’t forget this consistency also includes you. Your job is not to sit around and watch what he does while you do nothing. That is selfish and speaks of fear, etc. 2. You have s*x with a man and become closer to him than you really think you are. S*x causes soul ties and makes you emotional, thus you feel closer to a man than you really are. I don’t have to tell you how to avoid this mistake you, because you already know. Good or great s*x will always cause a woman to be with a man longer than she should and be with the wrong man. 3. Women are moved by beautiful things like shoes, curtains, homes, candles and a handsome man. There is more to a man than his looks. If you fall easy for nice looking men, find out why and make the correction. 4. You are a 30+ year old woman who is worried about being married, having kids before a certain age, or believing the lie there is something wrong with you being single. Of course there is nothing wrong with you being single. When you do worry, you will settle for the wrong man or make the wrong choice. 5. You allow your self-esteem or insecurities to allow you to settle for anyone who gives you a lot of attention. A man shouldn’t have to make you feel secure. You should feel this way because you are a child of God. I know we all have insecurities we need to grow and work on, but don’t allow them to cause you to have bad relationships, push good people away, or cause you to fall for the wrong man. 6. Thinking you can change a man is a very common mistake and it will always cause women to stay with men who have no desire to change. Keep in mind there are men who do want to change and become better men, so I am not talking about those guys. I am talking about those who have no desire for anything more than they are already doing. 7. You are afraid of being alone so you are with men for companionship, s*x, a warm body, dates, etc… Of course, when you do this, you can’t expect anything good to come from it. Thus, when something bad is the outcome, you will be the victim and this will add to the hurt or bitterness you already carry in your heart.

You and your sugar married man

Any married man who promises to leave his wife and marry you is immature, irresponsible and he will do the same thing to you if you marry him! Stop dating a married man because You are the reason his wife sleeps late at night waiting for him to come home late, you are the reason his wife cries every night, you are the reason he does not come home to his family, you are reason he does not take care of his family, you are the reason he does not eat at home anymore, You are the reason he has not touched his wife for months, Yet everyday and night, you kneel down and pray to God to give you a faithful husband when you are making another woman's husband unfaithful, you pray for a caring and loving man, when you have succeeded in diverting the LOVE and care of another woman's husband, you pray for a good home,when you are destroying another woman's home....... Ask yourself this question "WITH THIS KIND OF ATTITUDE OF MINE, WILL GOD GRANT MY REQUEST ?? "WILL I BE HAPPY WHEN I GET MARRIED ?? NO! God does not grant selfish request and prayers, "God said in His word that we should do unto others,that which we will want them to do to us And Whatsoever God has joined together let no man put asunder..... DEAR LADIES, Wake up, wise up, grow up and say NO to sugar married men, do not be deceived by money and material things, you have nothing to benefit,control your desires, don't try to be like others, look for job, even if the job is not forthcoming look for something you can do personally to make money, think of tomorrow, for everything is VANITY upon VANITY..... "THINK ABOUT IT". Don't Be A Home Breaker.

This is for the ladies

NEVER LET A MAN DESTROY YOUR LIFE! It might be hard to get over the man you love, but you won't know until you try. As women, we tend to continue relationships that destroy who we are – physically, socially and mentally .We give up our individuality, happiness, families, friends, pride, wealth and success- in order to satisfy the man in our lives. Lets face it girls, we are strong and can achieve so much without anyone's help, so why let someone destroy what you worked hard for? Let's appreciate, love and believe in ourselves. Elizabeth Nkau said: "I cooked and cleaned for him, stopped talking to all my male friends, came home early to him, bore a baby for him and what did I get? A promise to get married, which never happened, two other babies from another woman, a string of girlfriends calling his house and a Death sentence of HIV/­Aids. Was it all worth it? No, I knew all along he was cheating, but I stayed because I loved him. I never realised he didn't love me back. A man who cheats does not love you, he just likes you."I am waiting for my last breath as I lie in my bed, helpless, knowing I will leave my child without a mother."Ladies, please don't end up like this."Send this to all your girlfriends and male friends who can handle the truth. every night, someone thinks about you before they go to sleep. At least fifteen people in this world love you. The only reason someone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you. There are at least two people in this world that would die for you. You mean the world to someone. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look. Always remember the compliments you've received. Forget the rude remarks...I hope every lady learns 4rm dis

Dear ladies

Do you desire a great relationship? Then, you should follow these tips. 1. Be a goal-getter! Get something to do! Be responsible! There is nothing sexier than a smart and confident woman! 2. There is no prince charming – but you can make one out of your man. 3. You can lure a guy into a relationship with sex; you can turn 360 degrees in bed and do different types of ‘gymnastics’ to please him, but you can’t keep him forever with sex! Once he is tired of you, he willl move on. 4. Don’t go fantasying about the kind of love you watch in movies; they are make-believe. A high percentage does not happen in reality. 5. A man sees you the way you see yourself, therefore do not look down on yourself. Never think low of yourself, but then be humble. 6. Stop jumping from one club to the other, stop portraying yourself as a club – addict! Even a bad guy wants to marry a good girl.